For those of us who think for a living
A Neil Gaiman poem on refugees
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Category: Writing
“Reading Functional Programming: A PragPub Anthology will get you ready to dig into functional programming, and give you enough understanding of these languages to pick the one you want to start with. Highly recommended!”
Ron Jeffries, Just Some Guy at XProgramming, Inc.
Wait, what?
What is this Functional Programming: A PragPub Anthology of which you speak?
I’m glad you asked, imaginary questioner.
Functional Programming: A PragPub Anthology is a new book soon to be published by The Pragmatic Bookshelf. It’s a collection of articles from PragPub on functional programming. But it’s also an introduction to how functional programming is addressed in five languages: Scala, Clojure, Elixir, Haskell, and Swift. We’re pretty excited about this project. Watch this space or the Pragmatic Bookshelf site for the announcement of its publication date.
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The Juice of the Bean
(To be recited at a steadily-increasing pace and pitch, reaching a manic screech at the end.)
I need that first shot of the morning caffeine;
It helps get me up for my daily routine.
I’m not really fit to see or be seen
Till I’ve had a hit from the coffee machine.
I churned out, one morning, by seven fifteen,
On eight cups of coffee, the verses you’re seeing.
And throughout the day, why I drink it then too
For all of the crises it helps float me through.
And when I’ve more work than one person can do,
I’ll drink it fresh-brewed or as thick as old glue.
You may think it debased, or a tad libertine;
But let me indulge in my vice of caffeine.
I’ve tried to swear off but I keep coming back.
Just when I feel cured then I have an attack.
I know that you think that it’s courage I lack,
But I say it’s coffee, please, I take it black.
It makes me alert while it makes me serene,
So make me a cup from that coffee machine.
While coffee’s the niftiest sin that I’ve seen,
As vices go, verses are almost as keen.
But this one must end ’cause—you know what I mean:
It’s just about time for my klatsch to convene.
So grind up the berries, fill up the tureen,
And brew up a slew of the juice of the bean.